One of the many pieces of advice that as a new mum you get told is “Sleep when the baby sleeps”. Unfortunately for me its not really an option, i’m one of those people who cant sleep during the day, no matter how hard I try, if its light outside then I can’t sleep.
I find it difficult to go to bed early, only ONCE since I had baby C have I gone up to bed to have a nap and that was during the first week, after a 4 day stint in hospital where I got little sleep and because of losing blood during her birth I also had no energy. I just can’t do it. People who know me will know this by know, but I still get well meaning people telling me to “Sleep when the baby sleeps”, yea right that’s when my work starts… especially now.
My parents are actually away on holiday at the moment, they are spending 3 weeks visiting places and enjoying themselves, they defiantly deserve it. But it means that it is just Me, the boys and the baby here, not to mention the two dogs to look after as well.
I do love my boyfriend and brother, but they annoy the hell out of me. Neither of them can do anything without being asked. Any normal person would see a job that needs doing and would do it, but not these two. They act like its someone else’s job to tidy up and sort out everything. I’ve actually heard the phrase “but its not my mess” or ” I will later”. They have to be asked to do anything and still they don’t do it, or complain about having to if they do. I don’t mind doing washing if they bring it down, or filling the dishwasher if Baby C is asleep. I wash and sterilize all her bottles/ pumping equipment, and try to keep the kitchen clean and tidy. I feed the dogs breakfast as they are both at work, I sort out the recycling and bin all the rubbish.
I’m sure they think I stay in bed till noon and then just sit and play with the baby. No my day usually starts at about 7 am, this is after 2 or 3 nighttime feeds and changes. I get up, feed, wash and change the baby, then I get myself washed and dressed, I actually ended up brushing my teeth with one hand while holding the baby in the other this morning as she didn’t want to be put down. I then come down, feed the dogs and let them out and try and settle the Baby C into her carrycot so I can have breakfast. When she has a sleep I sort out as many jobs as I can, washing, tidying, ironing, entertaining the dogs. Baby C will want feeding and changing at various times, the door or phone will go, I have appointments and visits to do. Then when she is in bed I usually do a whole lot more washing, expressing, sterilizing cleaning, not to mention cooking some food at some point during the day. I finally make it to bed at 10:30 on a good night but it’s been after midnight on most, and then the cycle starts all over again.
I’ve resorted to a blackboard, with a list of jobs that need doing, space for a shopping list ( as i’m trying to do an online shop about once a week, and only running out for extras) and space for anything else they think we need to put on. I know that they won’t look at it and it does annoy me that they think that just because i’m at home all day and they go to work, that they shouldn’t have to help. I have baby C all day and night, I am Breastfeeding her so I do all the night feeds as well as daytime ones.
I know that the house being untidy isn’t the end of the world, a few dirty dished wont kill us and so what if i haven’t brushed my hair. It’s not easy being a full time mum, but I wouldn’t change it for the world, I love her with all my heart and when I do go back to work it will kill me not to spend all day with her.
I’m not superwomen and I don’t claim to be, I am just me. I am human and I cannot do everything on my own. I need help and I am not afraid to admit it, I’m just waiting for the idiots with the mutated chromosomes to see that they have some responsibility to help out.